The Jordy Flip: What really happened (from the Mavs’ fans point of view)

9 Jul

This is what really happened.  I don’t know it but I’m sure that’s how it went down.

DeAndre Jordan never wanted to be with a bunch of losers like the Clippers.  He signed with the Mavs because Cuban is so cool and DJ is from Texas and besides, in Texas you don’t pay taxes. He knew once in Texas the Mavs would fix his free throwing issues, hand over the keys to the offense to him and make him a megastar. Then that nasty loser, that criminal Doc Rivers, his henchman Blake Griffin and their posse of no-good thieves raided DJ’s home in Houston uninvited, busted the door open and jumped DJ, brainwashed him, told him lies about Mark Cuban and how hot it is in Texas and then barricaded themselves inside DJ’s home.  They locked the doors, unplugged the phones, pulled the curtains and turned off the lights to hide from Mark Cuban who was trying to rescue DJ from these raiders.  Poor Mark Cuban was driving around town trying desperately to find and rescue the poor DJ. They threatened everyone in Houston not to give to Mark Cuban DJ’s home address, and then they waited until midnight.  They even put a chair behind the door to make sure it could not be opened from the outside. A few of them hid in tents outside the house and guarded the house with shotguns.  They threatened DJ that unless he signs the contract for eight million dollars more than Cuban could pay him they would cut his balls off and feed it to their dogs.  DJ had no choice.  At midnight he signed to save his life from these bandits.

chairatthedoor                                                              tent

That’s how those Clippers did it.  They’re criminals and should be arrested.

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